Living and Loving 4: Types of Filipinas and What They are Looking For (1 of 3)

If you are an old (or older) foreigner looking for a Filipina, don’t expect to be chatting with too many highly educated young Filipinas from the elite upper class.   Sorry, but these women are usually not interested in older foreign men. Instead, upper class Filipinas will be looking for perfect soul mate love with other young educated upper class Filipino men. So don’t expect everything in one package, it’s not in the cards.

Now in general terms, without getting into specifics, there is one common denominator when it comes to Filipina women looking for foreigners: They are poor.  In seeking a ‘wealthy’ foreigner, they are hoping for a better and more secure life either for themselves or/and their family. Let’s face it –  Most of us are not super studs in the prime of our lives and we’re not going to be getting something for nothing.

Does this mean that poor Filipinas are all gold diggers, who will secretly scorn you and never fall in love with you?  No, not at all. Filipina women seem to easily fall in love, and if you find the right woman and treat her well, she will return that love and care for you. Actually, the situation is not as different as you might at first think from relationships in the West because women around the world are not looking for unemployed, lazy, uneducated partners. They want a provider, someone with a good job and education that is going to have the means to carry the relationship along.  In the Philippines, however, that expectation is even more exaggerated. The women are much more poor (Third World poor), and from their point of view, even if you are only middle class in your Western nation, to them you are rich. In a First World country an older man can find a young attractive woman if he is very rich. The women that he finds may be attractive, may be friendly and fun, but she is unlikely to an educated woman from an upper class family.  Such young women willing to be with a wealthy older man will be looking for a shortcut to an easier and more secure life.  It’s the same in the Philippines, except that, there are many more very poor women looking for a means to a better life, and even your modest financial resources will make you seem rich to many Filipinas. Of course, if you really are wealthy or rich, so much the better. Without sacrifice on your part you can make your potential partner and her family that much more happy and content.

However, if you really are poor and have no money to spend, then you will not find what you want. In order to find the Filipina woman that you are looking for you have to be able and willing to provide them with a better life. This means, particularly in the courtship phase, you can’t appear to be cheap. In the Philippines they have an expression for this concept , as follows:  No Money, No Honey.

 

 

Perverts and Players
Now even though I just noted that relationship expectations are not all that different in the Philippines as compared to the rest of the world, there is one big difference between your western country and the Philippines.  The age difference.

In a Western nation, if you are an older man with a very young woman you are looked down on as a pervert. Of course underneath this façade is extreme hypocrisy. The older men making such judgements are secretly jealous, and the older women are secretly angry. “What is it with  these older men wanting younger women? What’s wrong with them? Why don’t they grow up??” In the Philippines age is much more respected. Children are taught to respect and appreciate older people as having experience and wisdom. In the West – on the other hand – children are often taught that it is fun to make fun of older people. It’s a very big difference! The Philippines is much more family orientated than a typical western country, and it is common for three or even four generations of relatives to be living together in the same house.

In the Philippines, the concept of an older man with a younger woman is much more accepted. In fact, nobody gives much thought to the matter when they see an older man with a younger woman. It is mostly accepted and not too far out of the norm.

The attitude is if you are an older man of means in the Philippines, you are going to enjoy the pleasures of a younger woman, just like, if you are a man of means in a western country, you are going to enjoy the pleasures of owning a nice car.

It is common in the Philippines to see older foreigners with their young girl friends or wives, and common to see older wealthy Filipino men with their young mistresses. People don’t really give it much of a second thought, and to be honest, it’s a very refreshing difference from the hypocrisy of the West. It’s kind of funny: In the USA there is much less age discrimination in the work place, but much more age discrimination in relationships. In the Philippines it is the opposite.

If the idea of a much younger woman is appealing to you, and you are thinking whether you want to live in your own country or live in the Philippines, this alone is a good reason to give life in the Philippines some serious thought. Your relationship with your much younger wife will be accepted here in the Philippines, unlike in your own country, where you are more than likely to get dirty looks everywhere you go.

Another thing to keep in mind when choosing a Filipina woman is the family baggage that nearly always accompanies the relationship. In most cases these women have strong family ties and you may find yourself be constantly pressured for money.  You see, as the ‘wealthy’ foreigner, you are perceived to have an endless supply of cash. The pressure for money can be a very difficult thing and this is one of the things we will be looking at in other sections of these articles.

Oh, and, by the way, do you want kids? This is an important question to ask. Many of the younger Filipinas will want to become a mother. If you don’t want kids with your Filipina wife then choose a woman who already has kids.

 

Let’s Pigeonhole EVERYONE!
So now that we have discussed some background information, we can actually get into the real fun – examining the different categories of Filipina women you will encounter who are looking for foreign men. The categories are as follows:

Young, Smart, Ambitious (YSA) THE HUNGRY HUSTLER
This is a very young woman, usually between the ages of 17 and 20. She is smart, ambitious, attractive and she speaks English well. She wants to make something of herself. She wants an education, but is faced with the challenges of being poor. Perhaps she is hoping to go to college or perhaps she is in college but is struggling mightily to make payments on school. Along the way, she figures a good way to get an education is to find a foreign man. This type of woman is a big gamble. If you are lucky you can hit the jackpot and find a young woman who is smart and beautiful with a great personality, who falls in love with you and is grateful to you for giving her the life she wanted, and who will remain loyal to you. However, there is also a very good chance (a much better chance) that once she gets her education she will have no need for you. While with you, there’s a good chance she is craving young men of her own age and can’t wait for the time she will be independent. Whether or not you want to take a chance on such a woman depends on you and your attitudes. Perhaps you feel some internal reward about giving a young woman a chance in life and don’t mind if she leaves after a few years. In that case, this type of woman can be a good choice. However, if you are looking for stability, a woman likely to remain loyal to you, and content to stay and take care of you in your old age, I don’t recommend this category. Also keep in mind that if such a relationship does work, she will probably want kids.

 

Young Without a Clue (YWC)  CLUELESS
This type of woman, while often attractive, is often poorly educated and not all that smart. She is typically between 18 years of age to her early twenties. She is reaching adulthood and doesn’t know what she wants to do with her life. She has no skills, work experience or the wherewithal to find a good job. Her only real choice is to get married. Maybe she has Filipino suitors from poor families, but if she is going to get married and have babies why not marry a foreigner who can provide her with a better life? Depending on what you want, this type of woman can make a perfectly fine wife. She doesn’t have a whole lot of ambition, so she will be content to stay with you. If you are good to her, she will fall in love with you. She will desire to have babies and a family. There are two downsides to this type of woman. First, you may feel intellectually lonely. This type of woman provides companionship, but not intellectual stimulation, she usually lacks pizzazz or charisma. Second, she might have strong family ties that are always pressuring you for money.

OK, so that’s enough for today.  In the next section, we’ll be examing more types of Filipinas that you might encounter on your travels through the Philippines, among them the Nice Working Girl, the Pressured By Family, Older Career Woman, the Single Mom, Older and Separated, Older and Widowed, the Entertainer, and the Older Conservative Virgin.

Until then, stay thirsty everyone!!!